Top 10 Indications You May Need a Bath

10.   People say about you what Martha and Mary said about Lazarus:  He Stinketh.

9.     You take off your pants and…..they stand up by themselves.

8.     You’re considered very attractive…..but you only attract flies.

7.     You change your underwear and the pair you take off aren’t tighty whiteys.  They’re more brown, yello and sometimes green.

6.     The Department of Defense asks you to come in for some tests.  They’re working on a new chemical weapon.

5.     Pigs and other farm animals won’t come near you.

4.     People run away from you screaming ‘Bloody Mary!’ –Jobori, where did you come up with using ‘Mary’?

3.     The zoo won’t let you in.  They’re afraid you may harm the animals.

2.     You’re not allowed in public places.

1.     If doo doo smells better than you do.