Suggested by a story on WLBG News this morning about a young woman allegedly cutting the tires of the family car because they wouldn’t let her drive it.
#10… You’re having tight financial times. The bills are piling way too high for the money you’ve got. When the refrigerator goes out, you buy a brand new one and pay off all your bills with a new credit card with an introductory rate of only 18%. You were so happy to quality for the card, you went ahead and put a new matching stove on the card, as well.
#9 … It’s 4 o’clock in the morning. You’re sleepy and having trouble staying awake, but you have to be in Charleston for an important 8 an appointment. To wake up and be alert, you drink an entire pot of coffee. Unfortunately, you wind up spending excessive time in rest stops along the way.
#8 … It’s a tough day at work, and tension is high. So you take a drink of Jack Daniels to calm your nerves. It helped, so you have another.
#7 …There are some intimacy issues between you and your wife. To wit, she’s not as interested as you are. So you start to flirt with her younger sister to stimulate the wife’s interest and get the response you desire. Unfortunately it didn’t happen that way!
#6 …Your doctor tells you to stop smoking. So to help you not miss it, you decide to substitute one habit for the other, and try that new stuff called Methamphetamine. You have a friend who says it’s good, and helps you loose weight, too.
#5 …You’re driving down the Interstate at 80 miles an hour. A Highway Patrolman flashes his lights, you pull off on the side of the interstate, and in order to establish your turf, when the trooper comes to your window, you say “I want you to know I pay your salary.”
#4 …You have to drive through Atlanta, on your way to Piedmont Alabama. You know it’s a nerve wracking drive, so to calm yourself, before entering Atlanta, you begin drinking bud lights from a cooler in the back seat.
#3 …When the po po stops you on other side of Atlanta and sees all those empty beer cans in the back seat, you get hauled in to the county jail. You announce boldly, I wont be able to spend the night here. I’ve go to be in Alabama!
#2 … You’re attending Revival and the preacher gets to you with his talk that the only way to real peace is to fully confess your sins. You decide to do it, right then, right there.
# 1 … You’re going into a four-hour conference on silent prayer. In order that you are not distracted by hunger, you eat a big plate of chicken wings and pork ’n beans