Top Ten Crops for the New Laurens Community Gardens

#10..We’ve beeen going through hard times lately. Everyone needs a good laugh. Nothing’s funnier than flatulence 

#9 … To keep our police officers happy, the Mayor is  planting Cheerios to grow donuts 

#8 … We understand some of our local “manufacturers” are hoping to plant Sudafed seeds  

#7 …Our friend down at the liquor house is going to grow lots and lots of corn. We understand he’s got a secret recipe. 

#6 …At least one local family of Italian origin is hoping to plant Macaroni Seeds 

#5  …For our friends with glaucoma, we need to have a corner reserved for growing medicinal marijuana. Some will want to grow this as a preventative measure. You know what they say about ‘an ounce of prevention’  

#4 … A local chicken farmer is hoping to plant eggplants and cut out the cost of chicken feed.  

#3 …Lots of folks plan on cutting off the corners of their EBT cards and planting them to grow margarita mixers. 

#2 … Folks who like to put food away for the winter can plant ice cubes with their pea and carrot seeds. This produces frozen peas and carrots. Forest Gump always said peas and carrots go well together.   

# 1 … Some of our ‘good ole boys’ plan on planting peanuts along with pop-tops from old cans of Pabst Blue Ribbon. This produces a special hybrid plant called “beer nuts.”