Top Ten Reasons You May Be from California

By Jan Fullbright

 10. If you can lead 20 police cars on a high speed chase and you are only going 35 MPH.

  9. If Dominos Pizza has record deliveries while the high speed chase is going on.

  8. If it’s hot all year round, you have earthquakes a lot and you call your state the shake and bake.

  7. If you can drive downtown and see a woman in hot pants, very scanty top, high heels, and standing on the corner drumming up business, and you wave and say “Hi Mom!”

  6. If you are at the zoo and some idiots are taunting the lions, and one lion jumps the fence and attacks them.

  5. If you are in the Mohave Desert and you see a small stream in the distance, then in one minute you are in a flash flood that washes the road right out from under you.

  4. If you see fuzzy spiders as big as a baseball that can jump 10 feet in the air.

  3. If you see coyotes and buzzards fighting over the same road kill.

  2. If you actually see a roadrunner but don’t see Wily Coyote.

  1. If the city you live in has to shut down all their offices because they don’t have the money to keep them open.