Ten Things We Do When We First Wake Up In The Morning.

 # 10. Stumble to the bathroom, hoping you don’t stump your little toe.

 # 9. For men, lift the toilet seat, urinate, scratch your behind, then go to the kitchen for coffee.

 # 8. For women, check to see if the lid is up or down, make sure the seat is not wet, urinate, wipe, flush, then go to kitchen for coffee.

 # 7. Turn the tv on to get the news that you would really rather not hear.

 # 6. Try to beat your husband to the shower so the mirror won’t be fogged up.

  # 5. Check your cell phone for messages. See a note from your son or daughter needing a little more money to get by.

 # 4. Women, try to find suitable clothes that are not wrinkled to wear, and shoes to match.

  # 3. Men, grab the first thing you see to put on and wear the same shoes you have worn for over a year cause they are comfortable.

 # 2. Grab one more sip of coffee and make sure the coffee pot is turned off as not to burn the house down.

 # 1. Rush to get out the door because you are running late and have your mate tell you that you have a flat tire on the car. You are ready to give up and they say loudly, ” April Fool ” ! They really do not understand why you didn’t laugh!!!