Top Ten Things to Avoid at a Funeral

#10… Do not take pictures of the event with your smart phone. That would not be very smart, therefore being a misuse of a smart phone.

 

#9 … You want to avoid handing our business cards at the funeral. ….Especially if you are a life insurance salesperson. 

 

#8 … Do not volunteer to sing at a funeral. Even if you think you can carry a tune.

 

#7 … Ministers – no matter how stressed your church’s finances are, do NOT fall to the temptation to take up an offering during the funeral.

 

#6 … Its OK to offer water to those attending a funeral, but we here at WLBG suggest that, no matter how hot it is or how thirsts may be inclined, you should not pass out cold cans of  Bud Lite.

 

#5  …When you get into the funeral procession, if your car is equipped with large spiky wheels or loud mufflers, attempt to be as indiscrete as possible. Try to blend into the surroundings, and no matter how you may be tempted, do not attempt a road race with other cars in the lineup. .

 

#4 … Ladies, tank tops should be avoided, as well as dresses that are so short that undergarments are easily exposed at the slightest movement. Now the men will not disapprove, and you may get a lot more hugs from guys than usual, but we just do not feel this is appropriate, and does not show proper respect for the dearly departed.

 

#3 …No matter how happy you are to see anyone at the funeral, you should avoid breaking into gales of laughter with giant smiles on your face. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but something about this just somehow seems to be somewhat inappropriate.  

 

#2 … If you are going to have an interpreter to sign for the deaf at the funeral, be sure you check out the emotional stability of the interpreter.

 

# 1 … Avoid the temptation to flirt with an attractive woman within ten feet of your wife.