Top Ten Replacements for LDHS Coach Greg Lawson

 #10… Nick Saban. After loosing that game to Auburn because he just had to pile on one more field goal, he’s no longer welcome in Tuscaloosa.

 

#9 … Coach Arbogooble. Anybody who can pick football game outcomes the way he does deserves a chance to coach the Raiders. 

 

#8 … Coach Danny Ford. He obviously is looking for things to do, after all, he’s on all those Kia TV ads. He looks rested and ready to coach some more.

 

#7 … Mike Hughes. We know he understands football. He’s retired from his day job and has some time to invest. He loves the game and WLBG can always use another friend on the football field.

 

#6 … Dabo Sweeney. After the Tigers lost to the gamecocks five years in a row in such humiliating fashion, he’s got to be looking over his shoulder. Laurens would be a perfect next choice. He could commute for a while, if necessary, until he decides which of those big houses on West Main he wants to buy for his wife. 

 

#5  …One of the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders. Any of ‘em will do. Not that they really how to coach that well, but they’ve been around a lot of great games and they’ve got those certain attributes that can really motivate a young man to excel. 

 

#4 … King Dixon. I know its been a few years since he was a star player for the Marines, or All-American at USC, even more years since he was a big star for Laurens High – but when you’ve got it like King, you never lose it!

 

#3 …Richard Simmons. He could whip those overweight linemen into shape. Teach’em to dance and dazzle on the football field. Coach Lawson never taught’em how to dance!

 

#2 …Phil Robertson…..I can’t believe they fired him from Duck Dynasty. Anybody who can make Duck Calls like that can surely make some great football calls. Of course, he may have to at least trim that beard of his.

 

# 1 … Coach Scott King from CHS. After Clinton has hired the Police Chief then the CPW Manager from Laurens, maybe it’s time for Laurens to hire some luminous leader from Clinton.